The way that the Act Fluoride rinse works is that when pressure is exerted on the bottle, suction is created in the siphon tube that draws up the rinse to an opening at the top that holds the rinse. So, my trip in Cincinnati started at some 480 feet. Well, one should expect that the pressure decreases the higher you get, and it surely has. However, when traveling through Wyoming, I reached an elevation of just over 6,600 feet. At the Utah border, and continuing through to the Salt Lake Valley, you descend quite rapidly (it was a fun ride) until you finally reach Provo which is about 3,700 feet. For the mathematically challenged, that means the pressure on my bottle of fluoride rinse decreased significantly to the tune of more than 6,000 feet elevation change from Cincinnati to Wyoming, but then suddenly (and it was like a 6% downgrade for about 45 minutes) increased when I got into Utah.
None of this was on the forefront of my mind and so I unscrewed the lid on the rinse and the bottle immediately started to fill itself. Like the librarian on the Last Crusade that put the stamp down to look at it when it did something peculiar, I put the bottle down and watched in surprise as the bottle filled itself. What followed next was a bit of a flurry of activity. The bottle didn't stop. Alarmed, I picked the bottle up and held it over the sink. The bottle overflowing, I quickly tried to think of a way to stop the bottle. The stingy part of me (likely inherited from my father) didn't want to waste a single bit of the rinse. So without another thought, I put my mouth over the bottle to try and stop it. In hind sight, this clearly is not a clever idea, but in the heat of battle, one rarely has time to weigh the consequences. The Fluoride rinse continued to fill as if my mouth had no effect. My mouth began to fill with the rinse. My immediate thought was, "this is definitely more than the recommended usage." When my mouth couldn't contain any more, the red rinse leaked from the corners of my mouth. I'm quite sure if anyone had walked in on this scene they would probably just have closed the door and leave me to my privacy. Finally, to my cheeks great relief, the bottle acclimated to the pressure and stopped filling.
Flabbergasted, but completely alone in my apartment, I simply swooshed the insane amount of rinse that was in my mouth as if nothing happened and went to bed. I awoke the next morning thinking this must have been a dream that I had in the night. I went to the bathroom, saw the bottle half empty, smiled, and went to the days work. I skipped the rinse the next night, just for good measure.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Sunday, November 30, 2008
On Holidays
As Thanksgiving wraps up and Christmas moves in, I thought it fitting to make a few small observations concerning holidays. I am not trying to be completely satirical. Also, I don't mean to make light of holidays like Christmas or Pearl Harbor Day, when something actually happened worth celebrating or remembering. I'm just making observations.
1. My favorite Holiday is Independence day. I love America as I am sure most who live here do. Why then do we celebrate the birth of freedom in this land by breaking the law? I am sure that most of us probably don't shoot off illegal fireworks, but it is quite common. Don't get me wrong, I like fireworks as well as the next redneck, but I just don't think we honor the birth of the nation by disregarding regulations.
2. I never know quite what to say when someone wishes me a Happy Halloween. Even if the holiday was founded upon something worthwhile, isn't the point of Halloween to be scared? Maybe I'm wrong, but I think this one is perhaps the most useless holiday. We don't even get off school.
3. I live holiday to holiday. That is to say, I do next to nothing on holidays, then drag my feet through another few months of tiresome work dreaming about my next holiday. In the midst of these dreams, I usually come up with some kind of laundry list of things that I should/can do on the holiday. Of course, by the time the holiday actually arrives, I lose, forget or otherwise disregard that list.
4. Every holiday seems to be a reason to get drunk. I don't drink and it doesn't make much sense to me, but I'm sure it's logical to the rest of the world. I mean, what would St. Valentines day be without a bottle of champagne to seal the deal? New Year's Eve would be an utter waste if one could actually remember what happened.
5. I think it a bad omen that we gauge the value of a holiday on commercialism. I have heard someone say that this year is not going to be a very good Christmas because of the state of the economy. Persons who think along these lines clearly miss the deeper joys of this Holiday. Perhaps quiet reflection will take the place of the buzz of electronic entertainment this Christmas, for the better, I'm sure.
1. My favorite Holiday is Independence day. I love America as I am sure most who live here do. Why then do we celebrate the birth of freedom in this land by breaking the law? I am sure that most of us probably don't shoot off illegal fireworks, but it is quite common. Don't get me wrong, I like fireworks as well as the next redneck, but I just don't think we honor the birth of the nation by disregarding regulations.
2. I never know quite what to say when someone wishes me a Happy Halloween. Even if the holiday was founded upon something worthwhile, isn't the point of Halloween to be scared? Maybe I'm wrong, but I think this one is perhaps the most useless holiday. We don't even get off school.
3. I live holiday to holiday. That is to say, I do next to nothing on holidays, then drag my feet through another few months of tiresome work dreaming about my next holiday. In the midst of these dreams, I usually come up with some kind of laundry list of things that I should/can do on the holiday. Of course, by the time the holiday actually arrives, I lose, forget or otherwise disregard that list.
4. Every holiday seems to be a reason to get drunk. I don't drink and it doesn't make much sense to me, but I'm sure it's logical to the rest of the world. I mean, what would St. Valentines day be without a bottle of champagne to seal the deal? New Year's Eve would be an utter waste if one could actually remember what happened.
5. I think it a bad omen that we gauge the value of a holiday on commercialism. I have heard someone say that this year is not going to be a very good Christmas because of the state of the economy. Persons who think along these lines clearly miss the deeper joys of this Holiday. Perhaps quiet reflection will take the place of the buzz of electronic entertainment this Christmas, for the better, I'm sure.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Return of the King
After coming to myself, I have decided that I should return to the soothing power of the almighty pen, or in this case, the keyboard. Understandably, I feel hesitant about publishing a personal journal for anyone to read. Therefore, I will not write the inconsequential details of everyday life. Nor do I intend on filling in the large gap since my last post. In harmony with this, my 23 birthday will be a bit of a rebirth if you will. I have deleted former posts and now intend to keep up with logging noteworthy details. You will notice that each of my posts (including former deleted posts) will have a reference or allusion to dreams. This is intentional. I suppose I do it as a sort of "where's waldo" type of thing.
A word about the title of this post. There are several people that come to mind when you think about Kings, especially returning kings. Not the least of these are Martin Luther (he had a dream), Viggo Mortensen, Elvis Presely, Simba, and Barack Obama. There are even more serious things such as the Second Coming to consider. In this case however, yes, I am that King. This bit of arrogance is usually reserved in my family for my eldest brother, but he has taught me well. I have returned to the web log. Feel free to comment and rip my forthcoming opinions to shreds (if you can).
A word about the title of this post. There are several people that come to mind when you think about Kings, especially returning kings. Not the least of these are Martin Luther (he had a dream), Viggo Mortensen, Elvis Presely, Simba, and Barack Obama. There are even more serious things such as the Second Coming to consider. In this case however, yes, I am that King. This bit of arrogance is usually reserved in my family for my eldest brother, but he has taught me well. I have returned to the web log. Feel free to comment and rip my forthcoming opinions to shreds (if you can).
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